WWF SummerSlam 1994

WWF SummerSlam 1994
Chicago, IL
United Center
August 29, 1994

I haven’t watched SummerSlam 94 in well over 20 years. Much like KOTR 94, this event just fell off my radar and I never really went back to it. I remember the event super clearly though, despite not having watched it for so long. I especially have great memories of the hilarious build up to SummerSlam 94. That summer, my family went camping just about every weekend, and we’d always come home to a hilarious answering machine message from Matt, parodying the weekly Leslie Nielsen skit. My dad would be annoyed that the answering machine tape was full, but I thought it was super funny.

My huge interest was in the Bret Hart – Owen Hart steel cage match, and part of me really believed Owen would be winning the title. The way they were building Owen after winning the King of the Ring made me think a new champion would be crowned at Slam. The Undertaker-Undertaker feud was just beyond ridiculous, but there was genuine intrigue to see how WWF would pull this off. I remember some initial debate among my wrestling pals about whether or not Ted Dibiase’s Undertaker was the real one or not. However once the UnderFaker stepped into the ring for a match it was pretty obvious, but the story was pretty convincing and a unique angle.

Speaking of Ted Dibiase, he’s all over this pay per view. They were heavily pushing him and the Corporation leading up to this show, but the execution was just terrible. His stable of boring mid-carders fell off a cliff after this, leading to a year’s worth of extremely boring storylines and wrestling. At the time, I remember being somewhat excited at the prospect of this new Corporation and expected some pretty big things from Dibiase as a manager.

Another huge focal point of this show was all the hype around this being held in the brand new United Center in Chicago, IL. Damn, I fucking LOVED it when they would hype locations and arenas like this. The United Center was an attraction in and of itself, and it looked so good fucking good for this show. What a beautiful venue for a wrestling event. It’s weird how they never went there again for a PPV, opting for the historic Rosemont Horizon… errr… All State Arena instead.

Macho Man Randy Savage kicks off the show as the host, sadly his final WWF PPV appearance. The Macho Man is in full hype mode of course and pitches over to Vince McMahon and Jerry Lawler who handle the commentary for the show.

1) Bam Bam Bigelow & IRS (w/ Ted Dibiase) defeated the Headshrinkers (w/ Afa & Capt. Lou Albano) via disqualification at 7:19 when Afa interfered and attacked Bigelow moments after Bigelow struck Albano as he stood on the ring apron

Look at these hot young stars of the New WWF Generation!! I pissed my pants laughing as McMahon was going bananas about the New Generation while decrepit old Capt. Lou and Afa lead the Headshrinkers down to the ring, surprisingly minus the tag team titles. This was confusing as fuck when watching this PPV live. It’s a total mystery as to why they had the Headshrinkers randomly drop the titles to Diesel and Michaels on a house show the night before. Why not wait for Raw the night after? Super weird booking that I’ve never really found a definitive answer for.  The best guess is that it was because Samu was leaving, but he sticks around for the TV tapings after this event anyway. Dibiase’s Corporation is not off to a great start with this random makeshift tag team. The idea was good, but the execution sucked. Why not have Dibiase bring in a new team? Or come up with a permanent team? The match itself isn’t bad, but you can tell the fans have lost interest in the Headshrinkers as fan favorites. This thankfully moves along at a good clip, considering IRS is involved, and is mostly all action. The match inexplicably ends with IRS and Bigelow winning by DQ after Afa gets involved. WHY???? Nothing in this match makes any sense!! The two teams brawl down the aisle to keep this red hot New Generation feud going… or not. Why a strange way to kick off the PPV.

2) WWF Women’s Champion Alundra Blayze pinned Bull Nakano (w/ Luna Vachon) at 8:20 with the German suplex into a bridge after avoiding the challenger’s legdrop off the top and knocking Luna off the ring apron

Really great match, one that I completely forgot about and certainly didn’t appreciate at the time. Blayze was a real hard-hitting competitor, and it would have been interesting to see what they would have done with her had she not left a year later. This match was also all action. I should point out just how great everything looked on this PPV. The United Center was beautifully lit, really adding a shine to these matches. After a hard-hitting battle, Blayze picks up the clean pin, though this feud would continue. They really should have booked a rematch between them at Survivor Series, as that event really needed a boost.

3) Razor Ramon (w/ Walter Payton) pinned WWF IC & Tag Team Champion Diesel (w/ WWF Tag Team Champion Shawn Michaels) to win the IC title at 15:02 after Michaels interfered behind the referee’s back and accidentally superkicked the champion with Payton then preventing Michaels from breaking Razor’s cover

Tremendous IC title match! Razor Ramon cemented his legacy by winning the ladder match at Wrestlemania X, and dropping the IC title to Diesel soon after was a smart move. Fans were hungry to see Razor recapture the gold and he gets an awesome pop for his entrance. This match is notable for also having Walter Payton at ringside. Like all little WWF marks, I had no clue who this guy was, but immediately thought he was a huge deal because of how much the WWF hyped his appearance. Living in a WWF bubble certainly skews your perspective on fame! This match was fantastic – second best on the card. Say what you will about the shittyness of the clique, but when they were in the ring together, they worked fucking hard to put on great matches (most of the time). Shawn Michaels gets involved a ton and they kept teasing Peyton going after him. There was so much going on in and out of the ring and it looked like the odds were truly stacked against Ramon. Diesel was firmly in control, and in an amazing finish, Michaels gets into the ring to superkick Razor, but instead accidentally kicking Diesel! Peyton hauls Michaels down as Razor covers to the regain the title as the fans go ballistic! Razor and Peyton celebrate in the ring. I really loved this match and the moment, one of the best of the show. 

4) Tatanka pinned Lex Luger at 6:02 with a roll up as Luger was distracted by Ted Dibiase at ringside who had a bag full of money with him; after the bout, Dibiase confronted Luger in the ring with Luger kicking the bag out of Dibiase’s hand; Tatanka then attacked Luger from behind, hitting two Samoan Drops, and hugged Dibiase before the two left the ring together; moments later, Dibiase instructed Tatanka to give Luger a little more, with Tatanka applying the Million $ Dream on Luger and then stuffing a dollar bill in his mouth

I went into detail in my Sunday Night Slam review a couple months ago about how truly fucking shitty and stupid this angle was. It is unbelievable to see how far Luger had fallen in popularity and importance in a year. It seemed like a lifetime ago that he was main eventing SummerSlam against Yokozuna and was now stuck in this horrid Million $ Man angle. Ultimately, Luger should have been the one to sell out. A heel Luger would have greatly bolstered the Million $ Corp, adding some much-needed legitimacy, and it could have led to a fantasy scenario of him winning the Royal Rumble and getting the shot at Diesel at Wrestlemania. Would have been wayyyy more interesting than what actually happened. As I also pointed out in my review, this feud truly started out of nowhere. Tatanka was embroiled in a feud with IRS that simply dissipated. In storyline logic, why would Dibiase even want to pay a mid-carder like Tatanka to join his corporation? Everything about this, including the match itself, completely sucked. The match is nothing but a backdrop to Dibiase’s appearance and Tatanka wins with the cheapest roll up possible.

After the match Tatanka turns on Luger in the “shocking surprise” and beats the last bit of life out of Luger’s career as Dibiase eggs him on. The beating goes on and on until Tatanka stuffs a hundred-dollar bill in Luger’s mouth. Even watching this live I thought it sucked and was a shitty and obvious surprise. Again, it really should have been Luger who sold out.

5) Jeff Jarrett pinned Mabel (w/ Oscar) at 5:56 after avoiding a sit-down splash as Mabel tried to block a sunset flip attempt

With Mo injured back in spring, the WWF seemed to be semi-pushing Mabel as a singles wrestler for the rest of 94. This was hyped up for weeks as “rap vs country” and was a feud that no one cared about. Still, Mabel’s entrance is awesome, as he gets a huge pop. Oscar is a great hypeman getting the crowd up and moving for the M to the A to the B-E-L. Once the bell rings, it becomes your standard Mabel match. Jarrett works quick and dodges around Mabel’s squashing offence. It doesn’t take Jarrett long to take advantage of Mabel’s slowness and (unconvincingly) pin him for the win. They were obviously heating Jarrett up for his upcoming IC title feud and a clean singles win on PPV meant a lot at this time.

The majority of the show was already over by this point and it wasn’t even quite an hour and a half into the card. Tons of time left for the last big match… err… two matches.

As they erect the steel cage, they showcase the entire Bret-Owen feud dating back to Survivor Series. Holy shit this was tremendous – so many memories, so many great interviews and angles. This was a masterful piece of storytelling, easily one of the best in company history and one of my all-time favorites. I love how the WWF would always use the Hart family for these big PPV matches, and there’s a whole section of them at ringside, including the returning British Bulldog!! When watching this live, my head nearly exploded. I was a massive Bulldog fan, and in these days before the internet, I had no idea where he went after disappearing from WCW. I wasn’t even sure if he was actually returning or simply a guest for this match.

6) WWF World Champion Bret Hart defeated Owen Hart in a steel cage match at 32:08 when, as both men were hanging on the outside of the cage, the champion rammed Owen’s head into the cage and Owen was hung upside down with his legs caught in-between the steel bars; immediately after the match, Neidhart jumped over the steel railing and clotheslined Smith from behind, sending both Smith and Diana Hart-Smith over the barrier

I don’t even know how to put into words how much I love this 5 star, all time classic. This was peak Owen fandom, and I was convinced he’d be winning the title. The longer this match went, I kept sensing that Owen would be walking away as the new champion. Many have called this the best “blue bar” cage match in WWF history and I’d certainly put it at the top of my list. The psychology of this match is off the charts great. The whole match is laid out around the idea of escape. Owen’s game plan is to outwit Bret and escape to win the title. In a lot of cage matches, the cage itself is a weapon, but here, it’s a means to an end for Owen; seemingly a shortcut to the title if he can be faster and craftier than his brother. Owen starts going for the door right away and this gets off and running fast. Every move is done to edge closer to escaping the cage. The drama is unreal, as both Bret and Owen look on the cusp of victory right from the get-go. The intensity ramps up as the match goes on and you feel as exhausted along with them. On so many occasions, both Bret and Owen look to be on their way out to victory, but somehow the other brother snatches a handful of hair or tights or a boot, and drags them back in. The fans are super hot for this match, especially as the time climbs past twenty minutes and the desperation sinks in. It was a punishing battle right up to the 30-minute mark, as Bret and Owen are both over the cage and scaling down the side. Bret nails Owen, and he drops, hanging upside down by his boots. Bret hits the floor to retain the title. DAMN!! What a FUCKING GREAT MATCH!! Just incredible to watch this again. My appreciation grows fonder with every viewing.

BUT it doesn’t end there! The Anvil suddenly jumps up from his seat and brutally clotheslines the Bulldog AND Diana over the guard rail! Holy shit what a scary bump! Anvil goes nuts beating on Bret and him and Owen toss the Hitman inside the ring to continue their attack. The brothers are all trying to climb the cage and Anvil locks a chain around the door. Him and Owen put the boots to Bret and fight off the various brothers, kicking them off the cage. Bruce is of course insane as always and adds so much hilarity. Finally, the Bulldog gets into the cage and starts cleaning house as Owen and the Anvil escape. This was SO FUCKING AWESOME!!! I love it so damn much.

Wow! What a damn great PPV! What an amazing main event, one of the…. oh right…. we’re not done yet.

For some inexplicable reason, they decided to close the show with this farce of a match. The crowd was completely done after the drama and excitement that just unfolded and were not at all in the mood for the garbage that followed. As they dismantled the cage, we got a recap of the whole Undertaker storyline, along with the Leslie Nielsen stuff. Fun for a memory, but what a shitty place on the card to book this.

With so much time left, the entrances take for-fucking-ever. First Paul Bearer returns, then a casket comes down to the ring, then Bearer finds that comically ridiculous oversized flashlight urn and points it to the entrance way. Finally, the real Undertaker emerges and slowly makes his way to the ring.

7) The Undertaker (w/ Paul Bearer) pinned the Undertaker (w/ Ted Dibiase) at 9:10 after receiving a tombstone and then hitting three consecutive tombstones in return

What should have happened at this point is the real Undertaker should have chokeslammed this goof, dropped him with three quick tombstones and ended his career in two minutes. Instead, they tried to have an actual fucking match! WTF!! Who in the hell thought this was a good idea? They do some boring nonsense with the Undertakers mirroring each other’s moves. I do like the real Undertaker’s new upgraded purple attire, but that was about the only good thing about this. The crowd is completely silent. Like dead silent. McMahon tries to cover for this by saying that the fans are simply in aww, but you can tell that they are just as bored by this terrible match as the fans. They booked themselves into the corner with this, and by having a regular match, it ruined things entirely. This would have been the time for an epic squash or some cool black magic. Finally, finally this thing limps to a boring conclusion. And the pop for the Undertaker is less than enthusiastic. Fans still can’t figure out why this closed the show, especially after the high drama in the cage match. The show up to that point had been mostly great, but this ended things on a really crappy note.