WWE Wrestlemania XXVII

WWE WrestleMania 27
Atlanta, GA
Georgia Dome
April 3, 2011

Last year around the time of Wrestlemania I decided that I should properly own a copy of every Wrestlemania. I picked up this Blu-ray on sale cheap off of Amazon, and a couple more over the summer with plans of giving these modern Manias another chance.

I had only ever seen this Mania once, on the day of, so was kind of excited to see it again and see if it was really as bad as I’ve thought over the last five years. Most of these later Wrestlemanias, starting really with 23, all kind of blend together. They’re all in super stadiums, with a similar enormous set, larger than life screens, seas of fans, big fireworks, etc. All spectacle, but not always much substance. Because of the way the WWE began promoting Wrestlemania in the early 20s, it no longer was meant to feel like a regular wrestling PPV. The length of Mania increased, but with each passing year, the number of matches dwindled. Mania became less about real feuds and culminations of storylines and more about individual feel-good stories, dream matches, guest appearances, the fucking Undertaker, the Hall of Fame etc. A couple big matches get promoted with the rest being mid-card filler. It’s like they brought back the formula of Wrestlemania 1 and made it the blueprint for every Mania since about 24.

The Blu-ray contains a bunch of extras, like the Hall of Fame, which I have yet to watch, but I did watch the not shown match.

0) The Great Khali won an impromptu battle royal by last eliminating WWE US Champion Sheamus at 8:29; the bout was originally Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan in a lumberjack match but referee Charles Robinson stopped the match at 4:19 when the lumberjacks began fighting with the two wrestlers; moments later, Teddy Long appeared and ordered all the wrestlers to compete in a battle royal;

This was the first of many, many stupid things at this event. The advertised U.S. title match between Sheamus and Daniel Bryan was booted to the dark match. This was prior to Wrestlemania even having a pre-show. And for what reason? Because the Rock needed to do a crappy 20 minute promo. These asinine decisions have ruined my enjoyment of many a modern Mania. Sure, the Bulldog-Berzerker match getting cut from Wrestlemania 8 thanks to a dumb Lex Luger WBF interview sucked and was stupid, but c’mon, a match for a supposedly important title? No wonder fans didn’t buy into the WWE’s attempt in the last year to make the US title mean something. It’s not considered as important as a Rock promo or a Pee Wee Herman segment. The match itself was a Lumberjack match just to get the rest of the mid and lower carders featured, and after a couple of minutes it of course becomes a battle royal thanks to Teddy Long when they all start brawling. And who should win the battle royal? The Great F’N Khali. Good grief what a mess.

Well, it was finally nice to see the first 20 minutes of the event after five years. We get a long ass Rock interview where he went on about Fruity Pebbles and did all his usual outdated catch phrases. At the time this was all awesome since the Rock had been gone for so long and seemed fresh and exciting. Now it was a chore to sit through. The fans in Atlanta were going nuts for the Rock and his feud with Cena seemed much more important than the Miz being the defending champ.

1) World Heavyweight Champion Edge (w/ Christian) pinned Alberto Del Rio (w/ Brodus Clay) at 11:09 with the spear, shortly after Christian hit a tornado DDT on the floor on an interfering Clay

Wow, sooooo much wrong with this entire picture. Alberto Del Rio won a 40 man Royal Rumble, which should have been an amazing accomplishment. What did this lead to? A heatless and pointless opening match at Wrestlemania. I’ll never get why this was the opening match, especially since the Miz just won in the last match anyway. This could have been promoted properly as Edge’s farewell match and title defence, and Mania could have ended on an amazing happy note, but instead it’s wasted here and on Raw the next night. Secondly, the match itself is crappy. Was no better than an average Raw mid-card match. Surely these two were capable of much more, again, especially if it was to be Edge’s last match ever. Thirdly, Edge and Christian came off as total dick heels as they smashed Alberto’s car (poorly I may add) as he lay crying in the ring. Why didn’t him and his bodyguard Brodus Clay at least run up the ramp to try and stop them? This match was a terrible way to open the show, and I remember how disappointed Matt and myself were, knowing this was not a good sign of what was to come.

There were numerous awful backstage segments that we hated so much at the time, and I hated just as much now. I don’t remember when exactly they fell within the card, and I don’t care enough to look it up. What makes me so mad is that they could have matches, even short ones, in the time it takes for all this garbage.

2) Cody Rhodes pinned Rey Mysterio Jr. with Crossroads at 12:00 after hitting him with Mysterio’s own leg brace behind the referee’s back as Mysterio attempted a dive to the floor

Oh boy, I had forgot all about this ridiculous feud. Rhodes had his nose broken or something by Mysterio and believed he was permanently disfigured. He had hilarious music and a Titantron video representing his demented state of mind. Rhodes has had so many gimmicks over his 10 year (or whatever) career, but he’s never been very over. The Children’s Halloween Costume kept up his Mania tradition of wearing a true Halloween costume when he wrestled. How in the hell are you supposed to take any of this seriously? I guess the IWC sure loved it at the time. This match was okay, and I’m glad to see some of these actual mid-card feuds make it to Mania. The best part was that Cody won, which I had forgot all about.

3) Kofi Kingston. Kane, the Big Show, & Santino Marella defeated The Corre (WWE IC Champion Wade Barrett, Ezekiel Jackson, WWE Tag Team Champions Heath Slater & Justin Gabriel) at 1:35 when Show pinned Slater with the punch to the face after Santino hit the Cobra on Slater

Easily one of the biggest botches in the ’10s era was the dissolution of the Nexus. It was one of the hottest and most memorable Raw debuts of the new millennium, and came at the perfect time as fans were growing tired of the likes of Cena and Orton. This should have been the start of something new and big, and the Nexus should have ruled the WWE as heels all the way until Mania where they would battle a team lead by Cena. Well unfortunately that all happened within two months of the Nexus being in, and that big match came at Summerslam rather than Mania. Instead the group fell apart for no conceivable reason (apparently Cena didn’t like them) and we got the modern day equivalent of NWO Hollywood and NWO Wolfpac, but somehow much crappier. The Corre were buried like the jobbers they are and their careers never recovered.

4) Randy Orton pinned CM Punk at 14:40 with the RKO as Punk attempted a springboard clothesline off the top, moments after Punk avoided a regular RKO inside the ring

Internet nerds seem to love this match, I guess because their comic book lovin’ hero was fighting a real life meme. It was another good mid-card battle, but like everything else was tinged with stupidity. Why was CM Punk the leader of the “New Nexus”? Man I laughed at seeing geeks like Curtis Axel and Husky “Bray Wyatt” Harris get demolished by Orton in the prematch clips. Truly the NWO B-Team. This whole feud between Punk and Orton was equally stupid as it stemmed from years back when Orton punted Punk in the head, back in the Legacy days, and stole his spot in some multi-man title match. Best part of all was that we got to see MANU in a clip (remember Sim Snuka lol!)! For no reason, years later, Punk decided to get revenge on Orton. I laughed at the terrible prematch promo where Punk was basically like “I bet you’re all wondering why I waited so long to get even with Orton” a question he didn’t really answer. The match itself was fine, but not nearly as spectacular as the IWC would have you believe.

5) Michael Cole (w/ Jack Swagger) defeated Jerry Lawler via reverse decision at 13:45; Lawler originally won the match via submission with the ankle lock

Remembering this feud makes me want to throw up. It was back in the days when I would still semi-regularly watch Raw, and had to endure the endless “Cole Mine” segments and the grating heel commentary of Cole – it was just horrendous. Everything about this feud was pure garbage, but hey, we all knew the payoff would be great. But of course it wasn’t. It was a slow, plodding, and ridiculous mess, with an equally slow, plodding, and horrible conclusion. I can’t put into words how much I hated all this even now. I even hated Austin’s stupid celebration at the end, with him stunning Booker T. I hated the reverse decision. I hated the anonymous Raw GM. Lawler should have destroyed Cole in epic fashion and celebrated his first ever match/win at Wrestlemania in grand style, as a tribute to his legendary career, but nope, it was all a big farce.

Howard Finkel introduced the 2011 WWE Hall of Fame inductees to the entrance stage – Abdullah the Butcher, Sunny, the Road Warriors & Paul Ellering, Drew Carey, Bob Armstrong, and Jim Duggan, with Shawn Michaels coming out last to his entrance music

During this segment I realized that they’re going to start running out of legitimate hall of famers in the coming years. Why in the hell is Abdullah the Butcher in the WWE Hall of Fame? His matches were all awful brawling and stabbing opponents with a fork. I think he’s a worse inductee than the questionable Koko B Ware. Even worse was Drew Carey. I get celebrities like Mike Tyson and Mr. T, but Drew Carey? C’mon! And Shawn Michaels going in only a year after his last match seemed so cheap. In fact I forgot he was even in the damn Hall of Fame!

6) The Undertaker defeated Triple H via submission in a no holds barred match at 29:21 with the Hell’s Gate

Sadly for the Blu-ray release they edited out the Undertaker’s hilarious Ain’t No Grave entrance music. I had trouble paying attention to this match, as it was all slow and plodding strikes and offence. I get that the Undertaker’s really popular, but a lot of these Wrestlemania matches aren’t very good. I’m sure a lot of fans like the hard hitting, slow and methodical style, but I just found it slow paced and boring. Plus it was the same damn formula of endlessly kicking out of finishing moves and laying on the mat for minutes after. This feud was rushed and made no sense. I know they loosely tried to tie it to Triple H being pissed that the Undertaker ended Michaels career the year before, but that story felt flat. The very quiet crowd didn’t help this match much either.

7) John Morrison, Trish Stratus, & Snooki defeated Dolph Ziggler, Michelle McCool, & Layla (w/ Vickie Guerrero) when Snooki pinned McCool with a handspring splash in the corner and a splash at 4:16

Basically this was Trish vs Michelle McCool because everyone else was barely in the match, including that Oompa Loompa Snooki. I felt sorry for Trish, because her return to the WWE should have been a much bigger deal, but the crowd sat silent through this mess. I also kept thinking how weak Morrison’s offense looked. It seemed for a while like he was poised to be a breakout main event superstar, but never got above mid-card status. His moves looked indie-level, and fans didn’t even react to him by this point, and his stupid “Now listen, listen to me” music was so lame. Funniest of all was that Snooki scored the pin on the Undertaker’s wife.

8) WWE World Champion The Miz (w/ Alex Riley) pinned John Cena in a No DQ, no count-out, no time-limit match at 19:43 after the Rock dropped the champion with the Rock Bottom

Oh boy, this is hands down the worst main event in Wrestlemania history. Yes, worse than LT-Bigelow, which was a five star classic in comparison. It seemed even worse five years later. The Miz ended up being the current day Honky Tonk Man, becoming a jobber to everyone as soon as he lost the belt. The pre-match promos were pretty cool, but then you had the over the top, groan worthy bologna of the gospel choir singing John Cena’s music. Just what the hell happened to Wrestlemania?? The match itself was all kinds of crap, nothing but chinlocks, shoulder tackles, kicking out of finishers, etc. And of course, THE single stupidest ending to a Wrestlemania ever. The match ended in a double countout? Who’s great idea was that? And why in the world did the Rock help the Miz win? At the time I was shocked by just how bad this was. Truly shocked at what an epically bad main event it was. And going into it now, I thought, this can’t be as bad as I remembered, but wow, it was still all kinds of awful.

I’d almost recommend that you watch this Wrestlemania because it’s such a trainwreck. Thankfully, despite a really bad start, Wrestlemania 28 ended up being a much better event, and lead to 29 and 30 also being very good events too.